Room 100: What do you deem cheating when in a relationship?

Published On April 25, 2013 | By nowigetyou | Room 100

Remember to vote for who you agree with at the end


Cheating definitely means many different things, and there is no one true definition for it. I know when I am in a relationship; I expect my other half to be monogamous at all times. What do I consider cheating? Anything in advance of flirting! Flirting to me does not constitute as cheating, as it’s often a harmless act. Now let’s not get flirting and straight up thirst confused. If a man is half way hanging out of his car window screaming all the things he wants to do to you, then that my friend is thirst not flirting. Both women and men use the power of flirting every day, often in a bid to get their own way e.g. flirting with the girl at the coffee house so she gives you that little bit more cream on your hot beverage than she’s suppose to. When flirting is pursued as more than this, that’s where I believe the very grey area of cheating begins. If my man not only flirts with the girl to get his extra cream topping in the morning, but then decides he wants to exchange numbers and take her out to dinner one night, then we have a problem. Emotional sneaking around is how it starts and I think we all know how it ends!!

By Miss BE -   follow her on Twitter  @MsBeSays


So the way I look at it is when you are in a committed relationship and especially a marriage you should never have to share your partner. So cheating in my opinion can be deemed as lying to your partner or simply not telling them that you have been meeting up privately with another person who you have intimate feelings for (and the feeling’s are mutual). Even if you have not engaged in a physical act with this person and there is just some serious flirting going on behind your partner’s back that is just as bad in a way.  In this situation you would only be encouraging a physical act to take place. Without a doubt if my partner were to sleep with another woman there will be no chance for forgiveness, and I could not stay in that relationship. If you have nothing to hide you should be able to be honest with your partner when it comes to anything. So in other words it may not be called ‘cheating’ unless engaging in a physical act but in my opinion it is all the same, because when in a relationship and especially a marriage none of the above should be happening full stop.

By FreeSpirit – Follow her on Twitter @beutothefull


First of all, let’s get this straight, flirting is NOT cheating, it is natural part of life and not all men do it. Now we have cleared that up, I believe that cheating is anything that has anything passionate or intimate. YES, sex with another person whilst in a relationship is cheating – however, did it mean anything? Was it just an urge that you wanted to get out of your system? If it’s more than that then GET OUT OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP. It saves time, energy, arguments and tears, yes lads cry too even though they would hate to admit it. We are all human at the end of the day and should all play by the morals of ‘you wouldn’t like it if it was you’. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t agree with cheating but in some circumstances it is not always a bad thing. Sometimes, a kiss is just a kiss, a drunken moment. What is even better is when your partner is honest and admits they are cheating. But sometimes sexual contact with someone else leads you to the self realisation that perhaps you are head over heels for your existing partner. I do believe that cheating whilst marriage is morally wrong, it shouldn’t be done, you married the person you ‘love’ why do you want anyone else.

By Shoosie  – Follow her on Twitter @AmyLouiseC19


The term “Cheating” is very general. People have different views and opinions to what cheating is. Most things in life I play devil’s advocate to every life situation. This is so I don’t behave like a crazy female and over react, then “bust the windows out your car”, or bicycle whatever that man holds dear to him at the time. A lot of people are flirtatious. It’s a natural mental and body reaction. This is fine people. I think it’s actually perfectly normal and healthy to do, while you’re at work, or with a group of mates having a bit of fun. BUT!  Do not take that s**t home with you, i.e. when you are with me, this is my time, respect your woman. Don’t do s**t that is going to provoke a negative reaction out of me because you know full well if I pulled a stunt like that you would be selfish in the bedroom that night.


A lot of my Guy friends say it’s not cheating until you are married. So we should expect it. In response to that LET ME KNOW FROM THE JUMP WHERE YOUR MIND IS AT! Don’t tell me crap like ‘you are the only one’, ‘I’m fully committed’, ‘No I’m not talking to my ex anymore’. It’s not so much the action of what you have done it’s the trust that you will lose from me. I think this is a problem for a lot of women. Don’t tell me one thing and make me look stupid when you do the opposite. Women are very proud species and don’t like to be mocked. Don’t feed me BULLSHIT!

 Cheating is cold hearted lying and the lack of respect for the other person. It’s not so much the action after the lie. Once respect and trust is lost, it’s very hard to restore a relationship after that.

By Dimples with Attitude


Cheating is when you put what you have in jeopardy by involving yourself with another person of the same or opposite sex. There is no clear definition of what cheating is just people’s opinions and perceptions. For example many people see flirting as harmless, however If you are in it relationship with someone who perceives it at cheating and you decide to par take in some flirting at work for whatever reason and your partner finds out. In their eyes you have a cheated case closed. You can explain all you want but in their mind you have betrayed there trust. So cheating to me come down to the two individuals in the relationship defining what is acceptable. I’m sure majority of people would agree that sleeping with someone else other than your partner is cheating, but wait is that always the case what if you have an open relationship, or your partner consented. Then religion plays a part Muslims are allowed more than one wife. Christians believe you should only sleep with one person anyone else you sleep with after that is seen as adultery. So as I said before know one can tell you what cheating is you define it yourself along with your partner. So holding hands, flirting, sending texts, giving out your number, leading a person on can all be seen as cheating depending on who you are and who you are in a relationship with..



No one should put themselves in a situation where they know they are likely to even doubt their relationship/ marriage. There isn’t anything wrong with flirting if you don’t have anything more at the back of your mind. Though it can mislead someone else into feeling the need to be affectionate and temptation arises. This can then lead you to cheat. 

I know there’s certain situations where temptation can arise but it is not an excuse to be weak. Sorry you need to control yourself. I think even when you consider thinking of cheating it is wrong. It means you are clearly not happy in your relationship/ marriage. You should either fix whatever the problem may be or end your relationship so are free to do whatever you like without having to hurt someone else’s feeling.


Thinking to give in to temptation is one thing but from when you are engaged in a physical act; to me that is definitely considered as cheating. When married you should not cheat it goes against all principal. When you wed you vow to each other loyalty so why would you dishonor your promises to faithfulness.


Apart from when the physical act takes place I believe there’s different ways of cheating like when you confide in someone else apart from your partner (Emotional Cheating). That too is fatal because when you involve emotions you allow a door to open.

By ChrissyLegende -  Follow her @FrenchyChris




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